The Art of Spending
.The Art of Spending
Sanjib Saha | April 17, 2021
I GREW UP IN a middle-class family in Kolkata, India. Like most folks, my relationship with money was shaped by my parents’ financial habits. They were on different sides of the saver-spender continuum. My homemaking mother strove to live beneath our family’s means and never seemed to feel deprived. By contrast, my father—even with a modest salary from his government job—was focused on the art of spending.
At my mother’s insistence, my father bought most of our household supplies from wholesalers and cooperative stores, instead of the pricier local bazaar. Branded condiments and drink concentrates were missing from our grocery list, because my mother considered them overpriced. Instead, she joined a community food-processing center to learn how to make tomato ketchup, rose syrup and the like. She used to make enough for our family, as well as neighbors and relatives. My childhood friends still reminisce about the homemade mango-flavored drinks that she served them on hot summer days.
The Art of Spending
Sanjib Saha | April 17, 2021
I GREW UP IN a middle-class family in Kolkata, India. Like most folks, my relationship with money was shaped by my parents’ financial habits. They were on different sides of the saver-spender continuum. My homemaking mother strove to live beneath our family’s means and never seemed to feel deprived. By contrast, my father—even with a modest salary from his government job—was focused on the art of spending.
At my mother’s insistence, my father bought most of our household supplies from wholesalers and cooperative stores, instead of the pricier local bazaar. Branded condiments and drink concentrates were missing from our grocery list, because my mother considered them overpriced. Instead, she joined a community food-processing center to learn how to make tomato ketchup, rose syrup and the like. She used to make enough for our family, as well as neighbors and relatives. My childhood friends still reminisce about the homemade mango-flavored drinks that she served them on hot summer days.
Meanwhile, my father had no problem paying up for convenience and life-enhancing extras. He wasn’t extravagant, but he wouldn’t be deterred by the price tag if he felt an item was worthwhile. Years before television became mainstream, he bought a black-and-white set for our home. A few years later, a basic refrigerator appeared in our kitchen to give my mother a break from daily cooking. To manage these expensive purchases, he’d set a financial goal and then save regularly toward the cost.
When I first started working, I continued to live with my parents and—similar to my father—made a few big purchases. I installed an inverter power generator to combat the frequent electricity cuts at that time. I learned to drive and bought a used car—our family’s first ever vehicle—for occasional commutes when public transport was inconvenient. Each purchase emptied my accumulated savings but was worth every paisa.
This balance between saving and spending, alas, eroded over time. My attitude toward money increasingly came to resemble my mother’s. Ironically, this change happened because I started earning more—thanks to taking jobs overseas. I had grown up in a city with an incredibly low cost of living. Faced with higher costs abroad, my resistance to spending kicked into high gear.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
Final Thoughts A Legacy Letter
.Final Thoughts A Legacy Letter
Kathleen M. Rehl | February 12, 2021
YOUR ESTATE PLAN specifies what you want done with your money and possessions after your death. But your life’s treasures extend beyond these material items—to your values, heritage, relationships, hopes, dreams, memories and stories. You can share some of this with family and friends through a legacy letter, sometimes called an “ethical will.”
Not long before my mother died, she wrote her legacy letter. She asked that it be read during her memorial service. Her letter began: “To you, my family, who are reading my legacy letter, please know how important you are to me and how much I love you. Life has been such a fascinating and interesting adventure. I apologize for the times I wasn’t the Mom you would have liked me to be. Please know that I really tried my best. Forgive me if I have hurt you in any way.”
Final Thoughts A Legacy Letter
Kathleen M. Rehl | February 12, 2021
YOUR ESTATE PLAN specifies what you want done with your money and possessions after your death. But your life’s treasures extend beyond these material items—to your values, heritage, relationships, hopes, dreams, memories and stories. You can share some of this with family and friends through a legacy letter, sometimes called an “ethical will.”
Not long before my mother died, she wrote her legacy letter. She asked that it be read during her memorial service. Her letter began: “To you, my family, who are reading my legacy letter, please know how important you are to me and how much I love you. Life has been such a fascinating and interesting adventure. I apologize for the times I wasn’t the Mom you would have liked me to be. Please know that I really tried my best. Forgive me if I have hurt you in any way.”
Mom’s two-page letter went on to talk about what mattered most to her, emphasizing a great love for family. It was the major theme of my mother’s life: “As I’ve grown older, I continue to value family more and more. It’s so important to keep in touch by calling or writing. So much of who I am today is because of my mother and Grandma Green and Aunt Frances. They were very special ladies in many ways.”
A couple of times a year, I reread Mom’s legacy letter, written 14 years ago. Her wisdom and advice still speak to me today. How many times do you think I have revisited my mother’s legal will? Never.
I wrote my first legacy letter after my husband’s death. I’ve updated my message for family several times since, usually triggered by unique events—my son’s marriage, birth of a grandchild, a move across the country, starting a business, remarriage, retirement and the pandemic. Three years ago, expanding my legacy letter, I began writing poetry and stories, including photos from decades past. There are 62 pieces to date. I continue adding to my collection, sometimes sharing several of these with my children. They especially love the stories about themselves.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
https://humbledollar.com/2021/02/final-thoughts/
Free booklet I created, Legacy Lifeprint Letters & Stories, & Video:
Overnight Millionaires
.Overnight Millionaires
Posted April 13, 2021 by Ben Carlson
It’s basically impossible to discover new TV shows, music or movies before anyone else these days because everything is dissected immediately by some corner of the Internet, social media or podcast But back when Mad Men came out in 2007 my wife and I were into the show before it became a huge success.1 I wore this as a badge of honor as people eventually played catch-up on Netflix. It remains one of my favorite shows of all time.
The star of the show, Jon Hamm, took some time to find his own success as well.
Hamm was 36 when he got cast to play the ever-mysterious Don Draper. Despite being a struggling actor for many years before finally hitting it big, Hamm credits finding success later in life with his ability to cope with his newfound fame:
I think if you find crazy success at a very young age, then it can be quite dangerous. The road to celebrity is littered with people who got too much too soon and weren’t equipped to handle it.
Overnight Millionaires
Posted April 13, 2021 by Ben Carlson
It’s basically impossible to discover new TV shows, music or movies before anyone else these days because everything is dissected immediately by some corner of the Internet, social media or podcast But back when Mad Men came out in 2007 my wife and I were into the show before it became a huge success.1 I wore this as a badge of honor as people eventually played catch-up on Netflix. It remains one of my favorite shows of all time.
The star of the show, Jon Hamm, took some time to find his own success as well.
Hamm was 36 when he got cast to play the ever-mysterious Don Draper. Despite being a struggling actor for many years before finally hitting it big, Hamm credits finding success later in life with his ability to cope with his newfound fame:
I think if you find crazy success at a very young age, then it can be quite dangerous. The road to celebrity is littered with people who got too much too soon and weren’t equipped to handle it.
He also claims this helped him manage his spending and finances better:
I didn’t go crazy and buy some plane or anything nonsensical. Because I’m really not, that’s not my thing. I don’t love stuff. I have too much of it and it kind of just accumulates and gets in the way. So I’ve just kind of tried to definitely put some of it away for a rainy day and then try to make life more comfortable.
Bill Murray once said, “I always want to say to people who want to be rich and famous: Try being rich first.” In many ways, getting rich overnight is much like becoming famous overnight.
People look at you differently. They treat you differently. But you feel like the same exact person. There are far bigger problems in the world than coming into newfound riches but it does create a new set of challenges.
A newly minted tech millionaire wrote an anonymous piece for the New York Magazine called Confessions of an Overnight Millionaire. The article says since this past summer almost 750 companies have gone public raising more than $200 million. This has minted thousands of new millionaires. Throw in all of the early adopters of crypto and you have young people who have made more money in a short period of time than most people will make in a lifetime.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMZrEfvwVPY
https://awealthofcommonsense.com/2021/04/overnight-millionaires/
Two Words What If
.Two Words What If
Dennis Friedman | April 13, 2021
I’VE LATELY BEEN having a hard time sleeping—and I have a pretty good idea why. It has to do with two words that keep bouncing around inside my head. If you let them, those two words will also keep you up at night. They’re powerful because there’s no end to them. You ask, “What are the two terrible words?” The answer: what if.
What ifs are about what could happen in the future and, if you let your imagination run wild, it’s usually something bad. I’ve been thinking a lot about my future. I don’t know if it has to do with turning age 70. I don’t think so. I actually feel pretty optimistic about the next decade. I’m looking forward to spending some quality time with my wife once this pandemic is under control.
Two Words What If
Dennis Friedman | April 13, 2021
I’VE LATELY BEEN having a hard time sleeping—and I have a pretty good idea why. It has to do with two words that keep bouncing around inside my head. If you let them, those two words will also keep you up at night. They’re powerful because there’s no end to them. You ask, “What are the two terrible words?” The answer: what if.
What ifs are about what could happen in the future and, if you let your imagination run wild, it’s usually something bad. I’ve been thinking a lot about my future. I don’t know if it has to do with turning age 70. I don’t think so. I actually feel pretty optimistic about the next decade. I’m looking forward to spending some quality time with my wife once this pandemic is under control.
Still, I’ve been thinking a lot about my wife’s future, too. What happens to her if I’m no longer around? Will she have trouble supporting herself financially? Questions like these keep popping up in my head. They shouldn’t, because I believe we have these kinds of things under control.
The trust we set up and our well-funded investment portfolio should help her weather any unforeseen financial challenges that come her way. Also, all our important documents and contacts are stored in a centralized location, so they’re easily accessible. If she needs professional advice, we have a relationship with a low-cost financial advisor, tax accountant, attorney and insurance agent.
When pondering what ifs, there always seems to be another one. The other day, I started thinking about household emergencies. What if the hot water tank leaks? What if the electric garage door won’t close? How do I prepare my wife for those kinds of hassles?
I realize the real problem resides with me. My wife is a fiercely independent and intelligent woman. She can handle these types of everyday headaches herself. She doesn’t need me to try to prepare for every problem that might occur in her life.
Trouble is, I want certainty, but life doesn’t offer much. If you’re like me, and sometimes you’re unsure and hesitant, especially when it comes to managing your portfolio, here are nine money tips:
1. What if international stocks outperform U.S. stocks? What if small-caps outperform large-caps? What if interest rates go up? This sort of endless uncertainty can paralyze investors.
o continue reading, please go to the original article here:
Fit But Not Healthy, Wealthy But Not Rich
.Fit But Not Healthy, Wealthy But Not Rich
Your Money Life – Fit But Not Healthy
By Dave @ Accidental Fire · Published April 13, 2021
I took my training too far and became super-fit but not healthy. It got me thinking then, can you take the accumulation of money too far and end up in the same situation?
Can you become wealthy but not rich?
Let me give you my definitions of those two words for the purpose of this post. Being wealthy means having tons of money, plain and simple. How about being rich? If someone asks you “Do you lead a rich life?” most folks (I would hope) do not directly equate being rich to a monetary net worth or income level.
A rich life is defined by one’s relationships, happiness, and how much they give back and engage with others in the world.
Fit But Not Healthy, Wealthy But Not Rich
Your Money Life – Fit But Not Healthy
By Dave @ Accidental Fire · Published April 13, 2021
I took my training too far and became super-fit but not healthy. It got me thinking then, can you take the accumulation of money too far and end up in the same situation? Can you become wealthy but not rich?
Let me give you my definitions of those two words for the purpose of this post. Being wealthy means having tons of money, plain and simple. How about being rich? If someone asks you “Do you lead a rich life?” most folks (I would hope) do not directly equate being rich to a monetary net worth or income level.
A rich life is defined by one’s relationships, happiness, and how much they give back and engage with others in the world.
So can someone be wealthy and not rich? Hell yeah. If one pursues the accumulation of money at the expense of relationships and happiness, then I would argue they are wealthy but not rich.
If you put the relentless quest of something on steroids and go too far, you jeopardize missing the broader goal of where that thing fits into your life. You can easily wind up overshooting it and start doing damage.
That’s where I found myself with my fitness in the fall of 2019. Sure I was fitter than ever – for cycling. But I overshot and had weakened my immune system from the constant stress inflicted on my body.
Likewise if you’re seeking to be wealthy while also having a rich life, you risk the latter in the relentless pursuit of more money. Charles Dickens may have written a famous novella about a character like that.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
https://accidentalfire.com/2021/04/13/fit-not-healthy-wealthy-not-rich/
6 Money Problems That Didn’t Exist 50 Years Ago
.6 Money Problems That Didn’t Exist 50 Years Ago
Cynthia Measom Mon, April 12, 2021
For consumers today, America is much, much different than it was 50 years ago in the 1970s. For example, you can buy almost anything you want or need from your phone with easy monthly payments, the cost of child care can decimate your paycheck and if you take out student loans to pay for college, you can financially cripple yourself for decades after you enter the workforce.
If you are like most people, you use technology throughout each day, which means that you are likely constantly bombarded by various ads, videos, emails and text messages that are designed to influence you to spend money. And if you make a habit of taking the bait, you can create a whole host of additional issues for yourself — from identity theft to fully utilized credit card limits.
Here’s a look at six financial woes that people didn’t have to worry about 50 years ago.
6 Money Problems That Didn’t Exist 50 Years Ago
Cynthia Measom Mon, April 12, 2021
For consumers today, America is much, much different than it was 50 years ago in the 1970s. For example, you can buy almost anything you want or need from your phone with easy monthly payments, the cost of child care can decimate your paycheck and if you take out student loans to pay for college, you can financially cripple yourself for decades after you enter the workforce.
If you are like most people, you use technology throughout each day, which means that you are likely constantly bombarded by various ads, videos, emails and text messages that are designed to influence you to spend money. And if you make a habit of taking the bait, you can create a whole host of additional issues for yourself — from identity theft to fully utilized credit card limits.
Here’s a look at six financial woes that people didn’t have to worry about 50 years ago.
Fraud and Identity Theft
Carter Seuthe, CEO of Credit Summit, believes that fraud and identity theft as a means to open new accounts is one of the biggest money problems people have today that didn’t exist 50 years ago.
“Obviously, these things have existed for as long as people have had bank accounts, but it was much harder to pull off once banks and creditors began requiring multiple forms of ID,” Seuthe said. “Now, an unsafe internet connection can get all of your account information skimmed by someone who invests in $5 of hardware. They can use your identity to open credit accounts, steal money, and commit widespread fraud in a matter of minutes.”
Credit Card Debt
In the 1970s, only about half of American families had one or more credit cards, and the most common type was retail store cards, according to a report from the Federal Reserve. Today, according to the Fed, almost 8 in 10 adults have at least one credit card, which can add up to tons of credit card debt.
“Americans have a long-standing love affair with their credit cards,” said Lauren Anastasio, CFP at SoFi. “Credit cards have become increasingly popular and the norm for spending money. […] Depending on the type of credit card you have, people are more incentivized today by rewards points that you can cash in for things like travel, airfare or cash back — making it easier to overspend without realizing it.”
Overall Higher Cost of Living
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/6-money-problems-didn-t-181959284.html
What To Do When a Teenager’s Tastes Turn Expensive
.What To Do When a Teenager’s Tastes Turn Expensive
Trent Hamm March 24, 2021
Somewhere along the line, the toddlers and youngsters that used to fill my house with noise grew up into preteens and teenagers. The toys they once yearned for and constantly played with have slowly been packed away and given to charities, and their tastes have changed. They now want gadgets — cellphones, tablets, higher-end PCs — and our oldest is yearning for a car in the near future.
While a small weekly allowance used to work great for helping them buy the occasional toy that they wanted, a few bucks a week doesn’t really get them to the point of being able to buy the things they want. Sarah and I don’t want to simply hand them fistfuls of cash, either. Should they get a job? What’s the solution?
What To Do When a Teenager’s Tastes Turn Expensive
Trent Hamm March 24, 2021
Somewhere along the line, the toddlers and youngsters that used to fill my house with noise grew up into preteens and teenagers. The toys they once yearned for and constantly played with have slowly been packed away and given to charities, and their tastes have changed. They now want gadgets — cellphones, tablets, higher-end PCs — and our oldest is yearning for a car in the near future.
While a small weekly allowance used to work great for helping them buy the occasional toy that they wanted, a few bucks a week doesn’t really get them to the point of being able to buy the things they want. Sarah and I don’t want to simply hand them fistfuls of cash, either. Should they get a job? What’s the solution?
The cost of teenagers
The USDA reports that the cost of raising an average American child from birth to adulthood adds up to $233,610. That’s a stunning number, but in our experience, it holds true. Having a child means having a larger house, having a bigger food bill, having clothing and educational expenses, buying gifts… it adds up surprisingly fast.
This really kicks in when they become teenagers. Expenses increase as a child ages, averaging $900 more per year for teenagers between 15–17 years of age. Why? Teenagers have higher food costs as well as transportation costs.
This is in line with my family’s experience as our children move into that age bracket. Our teens eat a lot of food, usually far more than Sarah or I do at our family dinner table. Our oldest in particular is very interested in a car and is regularly talking about plans that will result in him having one he can drive.
Teenagers’ spending habits
All of our children’s tastes have become more expensive. Each child has developed a hobby or two that’s also rather expensive. For example, my daughter is constantly drawing and seems to consume art supplies, and my oldest son is a competitive speed cuber, which requires a seemingly endless array of combination puzzles of different shapes and sizes.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
https://www.thesimpledollar.com/financial-wellness/teenager-spending-costs-credit-building/
The Twelve Biggest Personal Finance Mistakes People Make Over and Over Again
.The Twelve Biggest Personal Finance Mistakes People Make Over and Over Again
By Trent Hamm
As I’ve mentioned before, I get tons of email from people describing the personal finance problems in their lives, commenting critically on things I’ve written, and offering up their own stories of success. Not only that, as The Simple Dollar has become more and more popular, I’ve had more and more opportunities to talk about personal finance with people face to face.
What amazes me is that I see most of the same problems pop up time and time again. Sure, the specifics of the story change, as do the severity of the situation, but these same twelve items come up in almost every story I hear about financial problems. Even worse, quite often multiple items from this list appear in the same tale of woe. I’m not immune to them, either. At the time of my own financial meltdown, I was guilty of the majority of these things. It was only due to a commitment to fixing my financial situation that I was able to overcome these mistakes and set them right.
The Twelve Biggest Personal Finance Mistakes People Make Over and Over Again
By Trent Hamm
As I’ve mentioned before, I get tons of email from people describing the personal finance problems in their lives, commenting critically on things I’ve written, and offering up their own stories of success. Not only that, as The Simple Dollar has become more and more popular, I’ve had more and more opportunities to talk about personal finance with people face to face.
What amazes me is that I see most of the same problems pop up time and time again. Sure, the specifics of the story change, as do the severity of the situation, but these same twelve items come up in almost every story I hear about financial problems. Even worse, quite often multiple items from this list appear in the same tale of woe. I’m not immune to them, either. At the time of my own financial meltdown, I was guilty of the majority of these things. It was only due to a commitment to fixing my financial situation that I was able to overcome these mistakes and set them right.
Here they are, the twelve biggest mistakes I witness and hear about time and time again.
Concern rarely extends beyond the next paycheck or two.
These are the people who live from paycheck to paycheck. Their next paycheck or two will cover the immediate bills. If there happens to be some money left over, it’s spent on frivolous things. These are the people who are constantly hitting the ATM to check their debit card balance so they know how much they have to spend or the people who juggle credit cards that are maxed out. The only thing that matters is the next paycheck and the brief breathing room that it provides.
What’s the solution? The best way for people in this situation to begin to escape is to set up an automatic savings plan of some sort. The automatic savings plan would scrape a small amount of money out of that checking account each week and put it somewhere safe. The point isn’t so much to build up savings (although that’s very useful and valuable), but to slowly wean yourself from spending everything that you bring in.
Only one person in the family knows where the money goes.
Most families have one person that’s largely in control of managing the money – and that’s fine. It can be very useful to have a family “accountant” – a person that manages the checkbook, makes sure the bills are paid, and so on. This can actually be a very good thing, particularly if one person in a family is particularly detail-oriented.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
Are You A Cheap Person? Or Are You Being Frugal?
.Are You A Cheap Person? Or Are You Being Frugal?
ByTodd Kunsman
Saving money and finding ways to make your dollars stretch farther is not necessarily a bad thing by any means. After all, not everyone can live lavishly all the time or never worry about their finances. However, sometimes your money saving ways puts you in a category of being a cheap person. This means you are becoming too obsessed with money, savings, and looking for ways to never spend. The problem is others start to notice and you may begin alienating yourself from friends and family. Instead, you want to practice being frugal and scale back on being cheap.
But what is being cheap about? What are the signs of being a cheapskate? And how can you tell if you are being frugal or cheap? Don’t worry, I’ll explore all these questions below!
Are You A Cheap Person? Or Are You Being Frugal?
ByTodd Kunsman
Saving money and finding ways to make your dollars stretch farther is not necessarily a bad thing by any means. After all, not everyone can live lavishly all the time or never worry about their finances. However, sometimes your money saving ways puts you in a category of being a cheap person. This means you are becoming too obsessed with money, savings, and looking for ways to never spend. The problem is others start to notice and you may begin alienating yourself from friends and family. Instead, you want to practice being frugal and scale back on being cheap.
But what is being cheap about? What are the signs of being a cheapskate? And how can you tell if you are being frugal or cheap? Don’t worry, I’ll explore all these questions below!
What Does It Mean to Be A Cheap Person?
A cheap person is someone who always buys items at the lowest possible price. People who are cheap do not care about the quality of an item and try to spend as little money as possible.
They often buy items just because they are on sale, and will still use them years after they’re worn out.
Cheap people hate spending money in general, and are willing to sacrifice time in order to find good deals. In general, a cheap person will only focus on price and believes that the best value is always the cheapest.
Being Cheap Is A Mindset
Being cheap is generally a harmful mindset, but depending on your situation it might have some short term benefits.
For example, if you are trying to pay off debt or live within your means for a specific amount of time, being cheap will help you get there faster. However, in the long term, being a cheap person actually does more harm than good. That’s because people who are cheap are usually only thinking of short-term benefits rather than looking at the bigger picture.
Sometimes it’s better to spend more on higher quality items, such as a good mattress or high quality jeans. Not only that, but being cheap can also be seen as unkind or selfish; if you’re always trying to get a free ride, or “forget” your wallet, people will think twice before being generous with you and it could even cost you some friendships.
Being cheap is a mentality that focuses more on the present rather than the future; if you’re seriously struggling with money, this may be helpful. But in general, you want to be able to gain an overall perspective over your spending and not only focus on the price.
Signs You Are Being a Cheapskate
Often being cheap or just a frugal person can sometimes have similarities.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
Why It's so Hard to Talk About Money With Friends—and Why You Should Do It Anyway
.Why It's so Hard to Talk About Money With Friends—and Why You Should Do It Anyway
Jolene Latimer Wed, April 7, 2021
Plenty of us feel totally comfortable talking with our close friends about almost every topic—sex, parenting, even politics. But what about money? In many cases, finances are the final conversational frontier among friends. While many old-school cultural taboos have been broken or at least softened, the stigma surrounding money talk remains—and it's a cultural norm that could actually be robbing women of the very conversations we need to improve our finances.
"You can be embarrassed if you have too little, or embarrassed if you have too much," says Diana Machado, who runs a business in Canada to help women find financial community. "There's no easy outlet to reach out and say, 'I need to talk about finances.'" Conversations about how to earn money and manage it are important in a world that still undervalues women's labor and financial education. Yet many women find themselves uncomfortable bringing up even the topics of salary or earnings (not to mention discussing financial hardships and discrimination) among friends, especially if they were taught growing up never to ask someone how much they make.
Why It's so Hard to Talk About Money With Friends—and Why You Should Do It Anyway
Jolene Latimer Wed, April 7, 2021
Plenty of us feel totally comfortable talking with our close friends about almost every topic—sex, parenting, even politics. But what about money? In many cases, finances are the final conversational frontier among friends. While many old-school cultural taboos have been broken or at least softened, the stigma surrounding money talk remains—and it's a cultural norm that could actually be robbing women of the very conversations we need to improve our finances.
"You can be embarrassed if you have too little, or embarrassed if you have too much," says Diana Machado, who runs a business in Canada to help women find financial community. "There's no easy outlet to reach out and say, 'I need to talk about finances.'" Conversations about how to earn money and manage it are important in a world that still undervalues women's labor and financial education. Yet many women find themselves uncomfortable bringing up even the topics of salary or earnings (not to mention discussing financial hardships and discrimination) among friends, especially if they were taught growing up never to ask someone how much they make.
For Machado, these taboos were part of the culture shock she experienced moving to North America from the Azores, a cluster of islands off the coast of Portugal. During her childhood there, she experienced the opposite.
"When I was growing up, everyone in our community knew our financial circumstances," says Machado. "My mom would always have women around her who were all in the same boat and understood what we were going through."
At that time, it was typical for men to be the family breadwinners, which Machado explains made financial stability—while feeding the family on one income—difficult. This became especially true when Machado's father began spending an increasing amount of the family budget on alcohol. To make ends meet, Machado's mother turned to her friends, the women in her community, for support.
"My mom would clean houses... They would pay her with food," says Machado of her mothers friends and neighbors. "I loved seeing women supporting each other. I always knew we would never be alone."
It's typical for women in many parts of the world to form communities around money, whether informally, in Machado's case, in formalized rotational savings groups. In Africa, for instance, traditional, female-driven, peer-to-peer savings co-ops—called tontines—see women friends come together to help each other afford emergency expenses or larger risks, such as starting a business.
To continue reading, please go to the original article here:
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/why-hard-talk-money-friends-214858346.html
The Do’s and Don’ts of Combining Finances With Your Partner
.The Do’s and Don’ts of Combining Finances With Your Partner
Sam DiSalvo Wed, April 7, 2021
One of the many things that became “real” once my husband and I got married is our finances. For four years, our only discussion about money was in the notes of Venmo transactions. I had no idea how much he made, and he had no idea how much I made; we just knew we had enough money to split dinners via Venmo.
That all changed when we moved in together and, shortly after, got married. Our short financial conversations had to become longer and include topics such as salaries, taxes and “how come you get so many Amazon packages?”
Here’s what my husband and I have learned after a few terrifying-but-worth-it conversations about combining our finances.
The Do’s and Don’ts of Combining Finances With Your Partner
Sam DiSalvo Wed, April 7, 2021
One of the many things that became “real” once my husband and I got married is our finances. For four years, our only discussion about money was in the notes of Venmo transactions. I had no idea how much he made, and he had no idea how much I made; we just knew we had enough money to split dinners via Venmo.
That all changed when we moved in together and, shortly after, got married. Our short financial conversations had to become longer and include topics such as salaries, taxes and “how come you get so many Amazon packages?”
Here’s what my husband and I have learned after a few terrifying-but-worth-it conversations about combining our finances.
Do: Show ’em What You’re Working With
My husband and I decided to do a “rip off the Band-Aid” approach and show each other everything, all at once. Sexy? Not quite. We each had tabs open on our computers of our bank accounts, credit card debt, student loan debt, credit scores and 401K’s and then showed them to each other. I was literally shaking when we did it because I had never shared this much information with anyone. However, being able to share that with someone who I love and trust was very freeing.
It’s always better to know what the two of you have, rather than being so anxious around it, neither one of you knows if you’re making the right decisions for your relationship. Remember: you’re on the same team. Having debt or a low credit score when you enter the relationship is not the end of the world — in fact, it’s extremely common. What matters is how the two of you navigate that going forward.
Don’t: Blame or Judge
We’ve all made a stupid purchase that we’ve regretted buying (see: tank top that says “Reno does it better”). Know that your partner has, too. So it’s paramount that you have compassion for each other when you begin combining finances. Remember: You’re working together, not looking for an enemy.
Our beliefs about money often come from our upbringings. While we don’t have control of these beliefs as children, when we’re adults we can start to question and change them — especially if they involve judging others harshly.
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https://finance.yahoo.com/news/don-ts-combining-finances-partner-110022481.html