Saturday Night "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot At TNT
Mot: Why Some Men Have A Dog And No Wife:...............
Why Some Men Have A Dog And No Wife:
1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
4. A dog's parents never visit.
5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
6. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk..
"Humor While We Wait" Chuckles from Sabickford and Recaps Archives
Sabickford: One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... l The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started.....
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the rump steak, rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself." And that's when the fight started.....
My wife and I were at her high school reunion. She kept staring at a drunk swigging his drink at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?" "Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up years ago. I hear he hasn't been sober since." "My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" And then the fight started...
Our lawn mower broke. My wife kept hinting that I should get it fixed. Somehow I always had something to do first, always important to me. She thought of a way to make her point. I came home from work to find her seated in the grass, snipping with a tiny pair of scissors. I watched then went into the house. I came out and handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway." The doctors say I will walk again, but always with a limp.
"Marriage Quips" Posted by Mot at TNT
TNT:
Mot: Here’s a little collection of the funniest, most relatable marriage quips I’ve come across in January of 2024.
Hope these add some laughs to your day! Janene
#1 Oh boy…
My husband is taking me on a shopping spree for my bday. I am dressed like I’m about to run a 5k. He is dressed like we are going to a fancy dinner. I gently explained that he grossly underestimated my ability to go the distance and he better hope his shoes are comfortable.
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer)
#2 Rookie mistake, buddy…
Let’s all bow our heads and pray for my husband who very tragically asked me what I did all day.
— Tracie Breaux (@traciebreaux)
Friday Night "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNT
Mot: Teacher Has Hilarious Reply When Asked Why Teachers Drink.
There is a group of people who have some problems that are very unique. These are the people who are responsible for shaping the next generation and how they handle things is going to make a difference in all of our futures.
There are times, however, when all of their efforts fall flat and you just have to smile and hope for the best. That fact is clearly seen in these answers to last year’s GED exam.
After you read them, you might just want to buy a ticket on the next rocket ship off of this rock.
The following questions were set in last year’s GED examination. These are genuine answers (from 16-year-olds).
How Popeye’s Obsession With Spinach Was Created From Glaring Misprint
How Popeye’s Obsession With Spinach Was Created From Glaring Misprint
Mistake from scientist led to signature feature of iconic cartoon
Popeye reaches for a can of spinach in a still from an unidenitified Popeye film, c. 1945. (Image by Paramount Pictures/Courtesy of Getty Images) (Paramount Pictures, Getty Images)
One of the most iconic cartoons of all time is “Popeye the Sailor,” and believe it or not, there is a day that has been created to honor the fictional character.
That day is today, but before any fans of the cartoon delve into celebrating Popeye The Sailor Man Day, they might not know how spinach consumption became the source of Popeye’s strength and a signature staple of the cartoon.
POPEYE® THE SAILOR MAN DAY | January 17
POPEYE® THE SAILOR MAN DAY | January 17
POPEYE® THE SAILOR MAN DAY
January 17 marks the 95th Birthday of the world’s most famous spinach loving, nautical hero — it's Popeye the Sailor Man! Today, we are taking epic strides to honor this legendary sailor who is tough and fit with tons of grit, as one of America’s most renown, pop-culture icons. After all, he yam what he yam!
#PopeyeTheSailorManDay
Popeye is the seeming underdog with bulging forearms, a mean uppercut, and a love of canned spinach. He is a defender of the weak and protector of those he loves. As the embodiment of strength and fitness, Popeye inspires us all to work hard, care for others, be persistent, and stay strong to the finish. Of course, all with the help of a hefty amount of spinach. In 2024, we are celebrating 95 years of this iconic figure, and the timeless inspiration Popeye has brought to billions of people.
Popeye was created by Elzie Crisler (E.C) Segar and made his first appearance in the comic strip "Thimble Theatre" on January 17, 1929. Originally created as a minor character, Popeye quickly became a super star. By 1938, the comic changed its name to “Popeye,” creating one of the most iconic cultural comic strips of all time.
Saturday Night "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNT
TNT:
Mot: I had a phone conversation today with a very nice chap. This is how it went:
"Hello sir, how are you today?"
"I'm very well, thank you for asking. And how are you? And more to the point, WHO are you?"
"Sir, my name is Mike, and I'm calling you from Microsoft"
"Mike from Microsoft, eh?
" Yes, sir - MICROSOFT, the computer company. I'm calling to tell you that we have found a problem with your computer and -"
"REALLY?? Well, that's quite concerning......"
New Years "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNT
TNT:
Mot: It's almost 2024, and I still have so many unanswered questions!!!!
I haven’t found out who let the dogs out!
where’s the beef?
How to get to Sesame Street?
Why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps?
Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same?
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
Why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails?
Christmas "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNT
TNT:
Mot: The Little Angel on the Top of the Christmas Tree!
One particular Christmas season a long time ago, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit; this stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out at heaven knows where. More stress.
Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hid the liquor and there was nothing to drink.
Christmas "Humor While We Wait" posted by Mot at TNT
TNT:
Mot: The Christmas Doll from Santa !!!!.............
As a joke, my brother Jay used to hang a pair of panty hose
over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted
was for Santa to fill them.
What they say about Santa checking the list twice must
be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay's
kids' stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung
sadly empty.
One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put
on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love
doll. They don't sell those things at Wal-Mart. I had to
go to an adult bookstore downtown.