How To Deal With Fights About Money
By Mr Chaos on June 26, 2021 in Family, Finance
Mrs C reminded me today that my annual appraisal is next week. I’d rather refer to it as our wedding anniversary. But either way, we’re coming up on 17 years. A thriving marriage is difficult to maintain. Which is why we should spend more time celebrating our anniversaries than our birthdays. There are many things that can lead to disagreements in marriage. But the most likely cause of stress in your relationship? Fights about money. The second most likely cause? Annoying habits. Perhaps I should work on the heavy breathing.
Fights About Money
Money doesn’t just cause stress in relationships. About 75% of American adults experience financial stress at least some of the time, regardless of whether they are in a relationship.
But the stress is exacerbated in a relationship as couples often have different financial values. Unsurprisingly, most of us blame our partner’s money habits for the financial stress.
The most obvious place where these disagreements arise is in our spending.
I’m Okay, I’m Not A Spender
There are clear challenges when one partner is a saver and the other is a spender. We tend to think of spenders being the issue. But I have friends who take saving to an extreme. Or more accurately, take their frugality to ridiculous levels.
Including an American friend who felt that a mud hut in Uganda should be more than sufficient for his new wife. Fortunately he realized the problem with his suggestion, otherwise he may still be living in that mud hut.
By himself.
A more common issue for the frugal is to buy the cheapest version of what they need. There are some quality cheap products out there, but there’s a reason why the phrase “you get what you pay for” exists. Mrs C would admit that this is something she’s struggled with in the past. Particularly when buying me birthday presents.
Spendy Pants
A spendy partner is likely to lead to fights about money. A close friend once told me that his fiancé was looking forward to being added to his credit card accounts. The credit limits on her cards had been maxed out. Bizarrely, this didn’t seem to be a red flag for him.
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