A Lesson In Learning To Say "No"

A Lesson In Learning To Say "No"

Nov 24, 2014  Tim Keown  ESPN Senior Writer

(Note: This Article can apply to Lotto-Winners, A Big Inheritance and Dinarians!)

HERE'S A CHALLENGE: Imagine what it feels like to be 21 years old, extremely successful, famously wealthy, wildly stressed and unbearably miserable. How, you might wonder, can all those conditions exist simultaneously?

Start here, with Cowboys All-Pro offensive tackle Tyron Smith, talking to his mother on the phone one day in 2012, his second year in the NFL, during a time of growing tension between him

"We've found a house," Frankie Pinkney told her son.

By this stage, wariness had become as intrinsic to Smith's identity as his brown eyes and bookcase shoulders. Silently, he awaited details. He had agreed to purchase a home in Southern California for his mother and stepfather. They would live in it; he would own it as an investment.

The agreed-upon budget was roughly $300,000, but over the course of the conversation, Frankie dropped the bomb. List price: more like $800,000.

Smith, now 23, is sitting at a polished wood table in the conference room of his lawyer's Dallas office. Surrounded by his girlfriend, accountant and lawyer, he fixes his eyes on a spot somewhere high on the floor-to-ceiling window. "Yeah, my parents wanted a house," Smith says. "But it was way bigger than mine and cost way more than mine."

It's not an easy topic for Smith to discuss -- recounting the conversation appears to be nearly as hard as being on the phone in the first place. He long ago gave up trying to pinpoint when it all went wrong, when the combination of family and money turned corrosive, when one ceased to exist without the other. He recites facts, stripped of emotion, as if determined to turn a painful time in his life into an after-action report.

"That call," he says. "That was the point where I said, 'That's enough.'"

At that precise moment, as he hung up the phone without giving his mother assent or encouragement, something hardened inside him. Reclaiming his finances, that was the easy part. Demystifying his new life -- being something other than a conduit for the wishes of those around him -- that was more complicated.

It works like this: We lack the linguistic dexterity to explain the myriad paths of young men who emerge from poverty -- or a simple lack of privilege -- and achieve riches by playing a game. When words fail us, a creation myth must fill the void, and so the modern professional athlete becomes our Sedna, a massive woman of Inuit legend who lives at the bottom of the ocean, controlling the underworld by providing fish to keep her people from going hungry.

Our version of Sedna frees himself from the streets -- the temptations, the poverty, the turbulent flow of every Bad Part of Town -- through a ceaseless, unquenchable devotion to his sport. Visions of The Escape accompany every rep on the bench press, every free throw in an empty gym. In short, his life is a series of made-in-Akron, Beats by Dre moments.

Yes, he will rise up to leave it all behind, but here's where the mythological sleight of hand appears: He'll bring it all with him too. He can't forget where he came from. The myth mandates loyalty and strikes down the ingrate.

And all those people who toiled alongside, those who believed in him and sheltered him and sacrificed for him? They'll also come along, for he's the sin-eater, absorbing all debts -- moral and financial -- so others can be absolved. And his people will never go hungry again.

Jeff Wilson His family's demands for money isn't an easy topic for Smith to discuss.

IT LONG AGO became easier for an athlete to subscribe to this myth than to defy it with his personal story. Easier to nod and smile and tacitly agree to be a benign receptacle for our society's need to bundle its fairy tales into color-coded boxes.

Why else would newly minted professional athletes -- and let's cut the pretense: It's nearly always young black athletes -- invariably be asked whether they've bought their mother a new house? Or a new car? Or both? Does anyone know whether Aaron Rodgers moved his stay-at-home mother and chiropractor father out of their Chico, California, home and into a beach mansion? Has anyone ever thought to ask?

But could it be possible, ever so slightly possible, that athletes who come from similar backgrounds can have wildly dissimilar stories?

Smith's story is best told chronologically. And it begins, as so many do, in a van filled with cleaning supplies rattling down a desolate highway somewhere in the Mojave Desert.

 To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/page/hotread141125/dallas-cowboys-tyron-smith-gets-control-battling-family-money

4 Steps to Make Your Money Last a Lifetime

4 Steps to Make Your Money Last a Lifetime

By Jane Bryant Quinn, AARP Bulletin

A simple, easy-to-use formula to make sure you never run out of cash

As a financial columnist, I get asked the same heartfelt question over and over: “How do I make sure I don’t outlive my money?” And that makes sense. Surveys confirm that the No. 1 worry among older Americans is running out of cash.

Fortunately, financial planners have come up with sound ways to prevent this. Collected here are their key rules for maintaining a livable income for life, plus case studies that show how to put these general rules into action. The goal is your peace of mind — knowing that you’re getting the most from the money you’ve saved and that you’ll always have enough.

The Magic Number

The key to long-term planning is knowing one essential number: how much money you can afford to spend annually. From there, you can adjust your expenses to fit.

You may be tempted to reverse the order — estimate your future expenses, then adjust your investment assumptions to make that spending appear possible. But that’s wishful thinking: a hope that big investment returns will rescue your budget. It leads to overspending early on, and regret later.

Instead, let’s focus on the real, guaranteed money you’ll have. There are two main sources:

Your personal savings and investments.

Your guaranteed income from other sources.

Download this worksheet to help you find your sustainable income. The key steps:

Step 1: Tally Your Guaranteed Income

The most common source is Social Security, which you may already be collecting. (If you’re not, get an estimate by calling Social Security or by opening a My Social Security account at ssa.gov.) You might also have a pension or annuity.

If you own a reliable rental property, include the amount of rent you receive after expenses.

Step 2: Estimate Your Income from Savings

How much annual income can you prudently take from your savings and investments? To get the answer, there’s a surprisingly simple rule of thumb:

Add up the current value of your spendable assets, such as bank accounts, mutual funds, stocks and bonds. Include both retirement and nonretirement savings.

Subtract from that total a cash cushion to help cover near-term expenses.

Then take 4 percent of what remains.

That’s the “safe” amount of your assets that financial planners say you can afford to spend in the first year of retirement without running the risk that your savings will run out. In each subsequent year, take the same dollar amount plus an increase for inflation.

Example: Say you have $100,000 invested (plus a cash cushion). In the first year of retirement you could spend $4,000 of that money. If inflation is running at 3 percent, your second-year withdrawal would be $4,120 — the first-year amount plus an inflation increase. Follow this pattern in each future year.

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

https://www.aarp.org/retirement/retirement-savings/info-2018/make-money-last-lifetime.html

How To Become A Personal Finance “Black Belt”

How To Become A Personal Finance “Black Belt”

Written by Sam  Getting Finances Done

David Allen in “Getting Things Done” compares productivity to the martial arts. He gives instruction on how to become a black belt in your personal productivity with a “mind like water” that allows you to handle anything that comes your way with a balanced response. When a stone is thrown into a pond, the water reacts with perfect balance. It reacts just enough to disperse the energy, no more, and then returns to a calm state. It doesn’t over or under react.  Becoming a black belt and having a “mind like water” in your personal finances is very similar. It means you can take whatever is thrown at you without knocking your finances out of control. You can respond to any situation with perfect balance.

Unexpected events or changes in your finances, good or bad, can be handled with optimum efficiency, and little or no stress. It means you can direct the flow of money where you need it almost effortlessly.

In an effort to help people gauge where they are in their personal finance development, I’ve defined what people at the various “belts” might look like. Where are you?

White Belt

You’ve recognized there is a problem with your finances and have committed to taking control. Recognition that there’s problem may come as a nagging doubt that you’re not meeting all your financial goals or a harsh reality check as you face mounting debt.

You have a lot of stress concerning finances (even if you’re living within your means). You tend to fight with your spouse every time you discuss financial matters. You recognize your spending isn’t in line with your true values. You have no idea where all the money goes from month to month.

You may be living paycheck to paycheck. If you saved $5 on your phone bill, it would just disappear somewhere but you don’t know where. Your idea of an emergency fund is a credit card or Home Equity Line of Credit. You frequently pay late fees on your bills and unnecessary bank fees. Net worth? What’s that?

Despite your lack of financial control, you have a strong resolve to take action even though the thought of facing the “deep mess” of your finances seems overwhelming. You and your spouse have agreed to work together. In an effort to get your spending under control, you’ve started using cash for your “out-of-control” budget categories.

You’ve stopped using credit cards somewhat reluctantly and possibly out of the sheer pain of your dire financial straights. Despite some complaining, your family has agreed to use cash as well. You’ve taken initial steps to figure out what your basic monthly income and expenses are and have tried budgeting for at least one month even though it doesn’t match reality yet.

Most importantly, you’re no longer willing to BE IN DEBT!

You’re no longer willing to constantly WORRY ABOUT MONEY!

You’re no longer willing to FIGHT ABOUT MONEY!

You’re no longer willing to PAY LATE FEES!

You’re committed to TAKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FINANCES!

You’re committed to WORKING THROUGH FINANCIAL ISSUES TOGETHER WITH YOUR SPOUSE!

 To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/blog/archives/2006/10/how-to-become-a-personal-finance-black-belt/

Benefits of a Cash Budget – Part 2

Benefits of a Cash Budget – Part 2

Written by Sam   Getting Finances Done

Be sure to check out part 1 about the benefits of a cash budget. In that article I explain how cash is the ultimate tool to help you control your spending and staying within your budget.

In part 2, I explain how budgeting will help save you time in the budgeting process.

How Cash Will Cut Your Budgeting Time By 80%

Think for a second about entering transactions into financial software like Quicken or YNAB. What are most of the transactions? By far the majority of the transactions come from categories like groceries, household, or entertainment.

They are purchases at the grocery store, or walmart, or the corner convenience store. What if you took those transactions away. For most people, there are only a handful or two of transactions left that occur every month. You might have utilities, a cell phone bill, a few gas transactions, but that’s about it.

Most of Your Transactions Come From Just a Few Categories

This is a classic 80/20 example. 80% of your transactions come from 20% of your budget categories. In fact, I would guess that for many people it’s more of a 90/10 rule. 90% of their transactions come from 10% of the categories. If you’ve used financial software in the past, go check this out and see if it holds true. In fact, leave a comment and let me know if it’s true. I know for us it IS true.

Now I want you to think about the time you spend budgeting every month and what that time is spent on. If you’re like us it’s spent on entering and/or categorizing transactions from the previous month. It’s spent tracking down transaction #x and finding out what it was for. Either you don’t remember or your spouse spent it and he/she doesn’t remember. You spend time tracking down missing receipts. It’s all a big mess.

Well all of that craziness doesn’t have to be. In fact, I’m going to give you permission to stop entering every transaction. How can I do that? Well let me ask this: why do you need to enter all those transactions? Do you really want to know how much you spend on milk every month?

Do you ever really care to know on an itemized basis what individual items you purchased in your grocery category? I don’t think that’s the case. If you think about it, all you really care about is spending the amount you want to spend in any given category. Well I’ve just shown that you can accomplish this goal by using cash.

You don’t accomplish this goal by tracking every little thing, if fact, doing so is a lag measure and won’t have any impact on how much you spend next month. You’ll just go through the same process taking a lot of time and experiencing the same or similar results.

One Entry To Rule Them All

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/blog/archives/2010/04/benefits-of-a-cash-budget-part-2/

Benefits of a Cash Budget – Part 1

Benefits of a Cash Budget – Part 1

Written by Sam  Getting Finances Done

In this article series of articles, I have recorded somewhat of a manifesto for using cash in your budget. You can listen to the whole thing in my podcast for week 4 of my 12 Weeks to Fiscal Fitness program, Using Cash In Your Budget.

In week 3 I talked in considerable detail about how to create a budget that works. In week 4, I’m going to talk about a tip that has been crucial in helping my wife and I stay within our budget. It has also helped us decrease the total time we spend on budgeting from month to month.

That’s right, I’m talking about using cash in your budget.

If you’ve been following this program faithfully, you’re already using cash in your budget. In week 1 I challenged you to use cash for your groceries and to choose to other problematic categories to use cash in. Now, I’ll finally go into the reasons for using cash.

Using cash in your budget is a tough topic. People shy away from it and toss it aside as being too much of a hassle. I want to challenge you to put those beliefs aside for a moment and let me make a case for using cash.

The fact is, I know how you feel. Using cash in our budget was one of the things I fought against most. We started using cash as part of Financial Peace University. It was one of those concepts I was ready to ignore and tried to convince my wife that we shouldn’t use cash. But she wanted to give it a shot and since I’d agreed to follow the program, I reluctantly went along.

I’m glad I did.

It quickly became clear how powerful using cash in your budget is. I was quickly converted and became a big advocate for using cash. In fact, I now consider it a requisite for having an effective budget. REALLY! I don’t know a single family who considers themselves successful at budgeting that doesn’t use cash.

On the flip side, I know plenty of people who struggle with their budget or struggle staying within their spending limits and are always trying to figure out why. Yet, they resist using cash. They just won’t give it a try. Or they give it a half-hearted try and quickly give up.

How We Saved $6,000 In One Year By Using Cash

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/blog/archives/2010/04/benefits-of-a-cash-budget-part-1/

11 Guidelines For Using Cash In Your Budget

11 Guidelines For Using Cash In Your Budget

Written by Sam Getting Finances Done

Here’s how to tell in which categories you should use cash.

1. You Don’t Have To Use Cash For Everything

To reap the benefits of using cash in your budget, you don’t have to go exclusively to cash. Some may choose to go exclusive, but it’s not necessary. Instead, identify which categories will be most effective for using cash using the tips below.  You should use cash for categories where either you tend to overspend or where there are a lot of transactions in a month.

Groceries are a main perpetrator of both those criteria which is why I absolutely recommend funding that category with cash. Other problem categories are ones relating to household spending (light bulbs, cleaning products, etc), eating out, personal, and entertainment.

There are actually some categories where it is easier to NOT use cash. Specifically I’ll mention gas for your car. At first Emily and I used cash for gas but found it to be significantly more inconvenient, especially during the winter.

After looking at our gas spending we realized that we don’t tend to overspend on gas. Our gas budget went up and down depending on the price of gas, but we weren’t more likely to drive less by using cash. I still had to commute to and from work no matter what and we don’t take a lot of trips.

Gas purchases also weren’t hard to track in our financial software. We knew that if the transaction was at Texaco it was gas so it didn’t add any confusion at the end of the month. In the end we decided that it wasn’t worth it to use cash and now use a debit card.

Some categories are on the edge and could go either way. For example, haircuts is a category that I think should not be cash, but Emily likes it in cash. From my perspective it’s not hard to track haircut transactions. A transaction at SportsClips is self-evident. There aren’t a lot of haircut transactions. At most I will get one and Emilyi will get one. I’m also not likely to overspend and get haircuts more often if I’m not using cash. For me, this category doesn’t need to be in cash.

For Emily that’s not the case. She is more likely to get a haircut or styling if there’s money available for it. She also will let money accumulate from month to month and then get her hair colored with the extra money. She likes having the money in cash because as it accumulates it gives her permission to do something extra without guilt. Therefore, Emily prefers to have this category in cash.

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/

Two Common Objections To Using A Cash Budget

Two Common Objections To Using A Cash Budget

Written by Sam - Getting Finances Done

People have a big resistance to using cash in their budget. We’ve become so accustomed to using debit and credit cards that using cash is like a novelty. I wanted to address a couple of the concerns people have and why they don’t outweigh the huge benefits of using cash.

Objection #1: It’s Inconvenient

One of the main objections I hear about cash is that it’s inconvenient. It’s true that using cash may take a little longer than using credit cards. In fact, the credit card industry is well aware of this and emphasizes this point.

Have you ever seen the TV commercial with graceful music playing as people use their credit card to check out. Suddenly someone pulls out cash. The needle scratches and the music stops as the person fumbles around with their money and all the other people look on disapprovingly.

That commercial presents a powerful emotional image.

The fact is, cash isn’t that much more inconvenient. In fact, some cash transactions are faster than credit card transactions. Even more important, you want to remember the effect using cash will have on your budget. Think of all the time and pain avoided by not overspending and not having to agonize every month while trying to reconcile your accounts. That pain is much worse than the slight inconvenience caused by using cash.

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/

How to Create a Financial Binder

How to Create a Financial Binder

Written by Sam Getting Finances Done

It’s a common worry. Am I spending more than I should? When are my bills due? Have I paid them? Am I on track to reach my financial goals? Am I going to be able to get out (or stay out) of debt? Financial worries are not only one of the greatest causes of personal anxiety; they can also be one of the biggest strains on a relationship.

Many people don’t have their finances well organized and therefore aren’t able to tell where they stand. Disorganized finances can have severe consequences; In the short-term, you may end up paying hundreds of dollars in late fees and penalties. You may be digging yourself deeper into debt without even realizing it. In the long-term you won’t meet your high-level financial goals.

Couples often end up re-hashing the same financial issues over and over again because they don’t have a way of tracking the decisions and progress they’ve made as a result of their arguments…er discussions. If your finances are not organized how can you ever have any hope of getting them under control?

The good news is that by taking one simple step you can start down the road of financial security and begin to get your finances in order. You can get a good overall view of your financial picture and establish a base from which you can build your financial future. It all starts with creating your financial binder.

What Is A Financial Binder?

A financial binder is a place to keep all of your high-level financial information including important decisions and goals you’ve made. Instead of containing transaction-level, detailed information about your finances, it is a place for summary-level information about such things as bank accounts, bills, financial decisions, savings goals, taxes, and credit reports.

Your financial binder doesn’t necessarily have to be a binder. Any form of organizing papers into categories could technically work. However, there are certain advantages to using a binder.

Binders are easy to expand. You can always add more tabs or upgrade to a larger binder (up to 5 inches).

Binders are easy to customize. You will inevitably want to create categories and information unique to your situation.

A Binder keeps items in one place and prevents them from getting misplaced.

Binders are portable. My wife and I sometimes like to review our financial progress during quarterly getaways. Being able to take our binder and go makes it easy to conduct these remote reviews.

Paper Vs. Digital Systems

Many people ask why they shouldn’t keep their binder information in digital form. Although your binder is paper based, many of the contents may be created digitally. Simply take the last step of printing out the documents after you work on them and you’ll have a nice backup.

Whenever you print a document, be sure to record both the date printed and the digital location of the file for later reference. While digital files do have advantages I discourage the use of exclusively digital storage for the following reasons.

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/blog/archives/2009/08/how-to-create-a-financial-binder/

"8 Ways to Prepare to Become a Millionaire"

"8 Ways to Prepare to Become a Millionaire"

Written by Sam

Today I went to lunch with a very wealthy person. I don’t know exactly how wealthy , but based on his frequent trips to Maui, the fact that he earns a free plane ticket every month through his frequent flier points, and the fact that the other day he decided to go out and buy a truck just because he’s never had one before, there’s good reason to believe he’s close to a seven-digit earner.

As I talked with him, it raised a lot of questions in my mind about how managing my finances will change as my wealth grows.  If I were a millionaire would I still need to budget? Would I still want to track all my spending? Would I still need to negotiate with my wife about finances?

It seems logical that with an income over $1,000,000 a year you wouldn’t need to plan as vigorously. But in the end that’s a lie. Millionaires that manage their money irresponsibly can quickly lose it all and fall from grace (MC Hammer comes to mind).

Financial management principles are the same for millionaires and low-income-earners alike. Certainly the numbers your dealing with will change, but the basic principles and processes are still the same.

In fact, by following sound financial management principles and optimizing your frame of mind, you can accelerate the process of building wealth and know how to keep it when you arrive. Here are 7 ideas that will help you think about and manage money like a millionaire, regardless of your income.

1. Be Who You Want To Be    Earning more money amplifies who you are.

I’m going to borrow my first idea directly from my lunch partner who said “earning more money really just amplifies who you are.” While that might seem initially like a good thing, it really is a double-edged sword.

For some, becoming a millionaire leads to a life of over-indulgence and decay. We catch glimpses of this in the popular media and entertainment world; drug addiction, abuse, and infidelity. Blemishes in your character will still be there if you become wealthy.

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that having more money will solve your problems. It could make them worse.

On the other hand, if you have a mindset of serving and making a postitive contribution to your family and community now, you will be able to manifest those contributions with even greater power and effectiveness when you’re rich.

By focusing on the positive contribution you want to make in your life, you will be prepared to expand and amplify your contribution as you earn more money.

2. Build Your Relationships   Earning more money amplifies your relationship dynamics.

Let me tell you a secret: earning more money does not solve your relationship problems. Even though my income has increased significantly over our 10 years of marriage, we still tend to argue about the exact same financial issues.

If you have bad arguments over $100, just think of the how intense they will get arguing over $10,000 or $100,000. Working out your finances as a couple isn’t about the dollars, it’s about your values.

By making all your spending and budgeting explicit, and by working as a team, you can address those values differences before they get out of control. As you become more wealthy, you’ll have a trusted, agreed-upon system in place to manage your increase.

3. Spend Money Consciously, But On A Macro Level

Even as a millionaire you should know where every dollar is spent, but you don’t necessarily need to know line-item detail. Rather, you need to know how much is spent within broad, macro-level categories.

To continue reading, please go to the original article here:

http://www.gettingfinancesdone.com/blog/archives/2007/01/8-ways-to-prepare-to-become-a-millionaire/

34 Hard Truths To Know Before Becoming “Successful”

34 Hard Truths To Know Before Becoming “Successful”

Dr Benjamin Hardy

​ 1. It’s Never As Good As You Think It Will Be

“One of the enemies of happiness is adaptation,” says Dr. Thomas Gilovich, a psychology professor at Cornell University who has studied the relationship between money and happiness for over two decades.“We buy things to make us happy, and we succeed. But only for a while.

New things are exciting to us at first, but then we adapt to them,” Gilovich further states.

Actually, savoring the anticipation or idea of the desired outcome is generally more satisfying than the outcome itself. Once we get what we want — whether that’s wealth, health, or excellent relationships — we adapt and the excitement fades. Often, the experiences we’re seeking end up being underwhelming and even disappointing.

I love watching this phenomenon in our foster kids. They feel like they need a certain toy or the universe will explode. Their whole world revolves around getting this one thing. Yet, once we buy the toy for them, it’s not long before the joy fades and they want something else.

Until you appreciate what you currently have, more won’t make your life better.

2. It’s Never As Bad As You Think It Will Be

​Just as we deceive ourselves into believing something will make us happier than it will, we also deceive ourselves into believing something will be harder than it will.

The longer you procrastinate or avoid doing something, the more painful (in your head) it becomes. However, once you take action, the discomfort is far less severe than you imagined. Even to extremely difficult things, humans adapt.

I recently sat on a plane with a lady who has 17 kids. Yes, you read that correctly. After having eight of her own, she and her husband felt inspired to foster four siblings whom they later adopted. A few years later, they took on another five foster siblings whom they also adopted.

Of course, the initial shock to the system impacted her entire family. But they’re handling it. And believe it or not, you could handle it too if you had to.

The problem with dread and fear is that it holds people back from taking on big challenges. What you will find — no matter how big or small the challenge — is that you will adapt to it.When you consciously adapt to enormous stress, you evolve.

3. There Is No Way To Happiness

“There is no way to happiness — happiness is the way.” — Thich Nhat Hanh​​

Most people believe they must:

First have something (e.g., money, time, or love)

Before they can do what they want to do (e.g., travel the world, write a book, start a business, or have a romantic relationship)

Which will ultimately allow them to be something (e.g., happy, peaceful, content, motivated, or in love).

Paradoxically, this have — do — be paradigm must actually be reversed to experience happiness, success, or anything else you desire.

First you be whatever it is you want to be (e.g., happy, compassionate, peaceful, wise, or loving)

Then you start doing things from this space of being

Almost immediately, what you are doing will bring about the things you want to have

We attract into our lives what we are. This concept is confirmed by loads of psychological research. In his popular TED talk, Harvard psychologist Shawn Achor explains that most have happiness backward.

They believe they must first achieve or acquire something to be happy. The science shows that happiness facilities success.

For example, Scott Adams, the creator of the famous comic series Dilbert, attributes his success to the use of positive affirmations. 15 times each day, he wrote the sentence on a piece of paper, “I Scott Adams, will become a syndicated cartoonist.”

The process of writing this 15 times a day buried this idea deep into his subconscious — putting Adams’ conscious mind on a treasure hunt for what he sought. The more he wrote, the more he could see opportunities before invisible to him. And shortly thereafter, he was a highly famous syndicated cartoonist. It couldn’t not happen.

I personally apply a similar principle but write my goal in the present tense. For example, rather than saying, “I will become a syndicated cartoonist,” I write, “I am a syndicated cartoonist.” Writing it in the present tense highlights the fact that you are being who you want to be, which will then inform what you do and ultimately who you become.

4. You Have Enough Already

In an interview at the annual Genius Network Event in 2013, Tim Ferriss was asked, “With all of your various roles, do you ever get stressed out? Do you ever feel like you’ve taken on too much?”

Ferriss responded:  “Of course I get stressed out. If anyone says they don’t get stressed out they’re lying. But one thing that mitigates that is taking time each morning to declare and focus on the fact that ‘I have enough.’ I have enough. I don’t need to worry about responding to every email each day. If they get mad that’s their problem.”

Ferriss was later asked during the same interview: “After having read The 4-Hour Workweek, I got the impression that Tim Ferriss doesn’t care about money. You talked about how you travel the world without spending any money. Talk about the balance and ability to let go of caring about making money.”

Ferriss responded:  It’s totally okay to have lots of nice things. If it is addiction to wealth, like in Fight Club, “The things you own end up owning you,” and it becomes a surrogate for things like long-term health and happiness — connection — then it becomes a disease state. But if you can have nice things, and not fear having them taken away, then it’s a good thing. Because money is a really valuable tool.”

If you appreciate what you already have then more will be a good thing in your life. If you feel the need to have more to compensate for something missing in your life, you’ll always be left wanting — no matter how much you acquire or achieve.

5. You Have Every Advantage To Succeed

It’s easy to talk about how hard our lives are. It’s easy to talk about how unfair life is. And that we got the short end of the stick. But does this kind of talking really help anyone?

When we judge our situation as worse than someone else’s, we are ignorantly and incorrectly saying, “You’ve got it easy. You’re not like me. Success should come easy to you because you haven’t had to deal with what I’ve gone through.”

This paradigm has formally become known as the victim mentality, and it generally leads to feelings of entitlement.

The world owes you nothing. Life isn’t meant to be fair. However, the world has also given you everything you need. The truth is, you have every advantage in the world to succeed. And by believing this in your bones, you’ll feel an enormous weight of responsibility to yourself and the world.

You’ve been put in a perfect position to succeed. Everything in the universe has brought you to this point so you can now shine and change the world. The world is your oyster. Your natural state is to thrive. All you have to do is show up.

6. Every Aspect Of Your Life Affects Every Aspect Of Your Life

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The Holiday Feast Costs Significantly More Than Last Year

The Holiday Feast Costs Significantly More Than Last Year

68% of American households are adjusting their Thanksgiving dinner plans due to rising costs — here's how much you should plan to spend this year

By Sigrid Forberg   Nov. 18, 2022

Even with temperatures dropping across the country, inflation remains scorching hot.

And with food prices currently serving as a major driver of the country’s record-high inflation rate, families already struggling to keep costs down at the grocery store might be worrying what the damage will be when it comes time to shop for Thanksgiving dinner.  Making a meal for the whole family — and whoever else ends up at your table — can be stressful. But knowing what you’re in for might help.

A holiday dinner for 10 will cost an average of $64.05 or just under $6.50 per person, according to the 37th annual Thanksgiving prices survey from the American Farm Bureau Federation (AFBF). The AFBF comes up with this price tag based on the average costs of a dozen classic items found at the big feast.

This year's overall cost is a 20% increase from last year’s survey, when the meal was expected to cost an average $53.31. Here’s how much the prices have changed in 2022 for each part of your holiday meal.

1. The turkey   2022 price: $28.96

The centerpiece of the typical Thanksgiving dinner — a 16-pound turkey — costs about $5 more than last year, when the average price was $23.99.

While inflation is partly to blame for this price change, there are other factors driving up prices.

“The higher retail turkey cost at the grocery store can also be attributed to a slightly smaller flock this year, increased feed costs and lighter processing weights,” says AFBF Chief Economist Roger Cryan.

And while Cryan expects there will be an adequate supply of turkeys this year, some states that dealt with avian influenza earlier this year may deal with shortages.

2. Pumpkin pie mix   2022 price: $4.28

What would Thanksgiving be without a gourd-geous pumpkin pie on the table? A 20-oz can of pumpkin pie filling will cost you about 64 cents more this year, compared to $3.64 in 2021.

A 2020 YouGov survey shows that pumpkin pie is the most popular sweet pastry after the Thanksgiving meal, followed by pecan pie.

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