The Cost of Friendship
The Cost of Friendship
Jacob Schroeder Jul 30, 2021
An oak tree can grow to 100 feet tall and live for more than 100 years.
In a mast year, an oak tree can shed as many as 10,000 acorns, hard little squirrel delicacies raining down dozens of feet on your lawn (or head) like tiny missiles.
These are things I learned only after shipping a young oak tree to a best friend and his wife to plant in their yard as a gift to celebrate the announcement of their first baby. I didn't consider whether they had room for such a large tree or even had the desire to deal with the maintenance. Instead, I only thought about the cost.
How much should you spend on celebrating a friend's big life events?
The tree came with a copy of the classic children's book, The Giving Tree, by Shel Silverstein. I sent it as a special way for them to mark the occasion. But truthfully, just like the boy in the book who repeatedly takes from the loving tree for selfish reasons, I also did it for myself. The root of our friendships is just as much about sustaining ourselves as it is about sustaining others.
Which is why I've been wondering lately: What is the cost of friendship anyway?
I took an unplanned month-long break from this blog. It was partly due to the demands of my day job and some other projects I'm building. But more so, because I was having so much fun spending time in the company of others again. Nights socializing replaced nights writing.
After not seeing most of my friends in over year because of COVID, there is a sweet sense of carelessness. No one cares if we meet at that overpriced restaurant. Sitting around a backyard fire is good enough reason to drink the expensive stuff.
After all, what are friends for?
A lot.
Why You Should Spend Money on Your Friends
While it is important to identify what expenses you can cut from your budget, it is equally important to identify what you like to joyfully spend money on.
We should never get too hung up on spending time and money on friends. It sounds trite, but it seems necessary to write because fewer and fewer people have them.
Amidst my time rekindling friendships, the most depressing thing I read about is the growing loss of close friendships. Even with all the communication tools literally in our pockets, we are as lonely as ever, according to a study from the Survey Center on American Life.
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