TNT:

Mot: A wife texted her husband:

"Hi, I’ll be late. Please cook dinner, wash all the dirty dishes, prepare our bed, and make sure the kids are asleep before I get back."

A moment later, she sent another text:

"Oh, and I forgot to mention... I also bought a bottle of BLUE LABEL PREMIUM SCOTCH WHISKY for you."

The husband immediately replied, "Really?"

She answered:

"No… I just wanted to make sure you read my first message."

Mot: So he sat down and wrote a cheeky letter:

One evening, John invited his mother over for dinner. As they chatted and laughed around the table, she couldn’t help but notice his roommate, Judy, who was charming, witty, and undeniably attractive. For a while now, John's mom had been harboring a quiet suspicion about her son and his roommate, and watching them interact that night only fueled her curiosity.

Catching the inquisitive glint in his mother's eye, John finally leaned over and said with a grin, “Mom, I know exactly what you’re thinking. But trust me—Judy and I are just roommates, nothing more.”

His mother raised an eyebrow but let it slide, and the evening ended pleasantly.

A few days later, Judy approached John with a puzzled look. “You know that beautiful silver gravy ladle we use for special occasions? I haven’t seen it since your mom was over. You don’t think…?”

John laughed and replied, “I doubt it, but let me check with her just to be sure.”

So he sat down and wrote a cheeky letter:

“Dear Mom,

I’m not saying you *did* take the silver gravy ladle, and I’m not saying you *didn’t* take it. But the fact remains that it’s been missing ever since you came over for dinner.

Love, your son.”

A few days later, John received a letter back. His mother’s response was brief but razor-sharp:

“Dear John,

I’m not saying you *do* sleep with Judy, and I’m not saying you *don’t* sleep with her. But if she were sleeping in her own bed, she’d have found the gravy ladle by now.

Love, Mom.”

************

Mot: a bit of Dating advice frum ole ""Mot"" of course